I have a fighter kind of a personality. I am opinionated and I’m not afraid to share my point of view. I am this way in pretty much every area of my life. For this very reason, I can not ever be a part of a parenting group or forum. Don’t judge me. It’s just that I have a hard time not responding when I hear generalizations and things that go against the very core of my being. The very core of my being, of course, is that the Bible is my handbook for how I raise my kids. So when people make up their own child-raising rules and tell everyone around them that they tried the Bible-way and it didn’t work, so instead they made their own rules. Oh ok then. Let’s go with your way. That makes perfect sense. See what I mean? You can already hear my sarcasm coming out and it’s just really not gonna help anyone. Hey. At least I know my limitations. I just quietly back out of the groups that I’m invited to join.
We are constantly bombarded with things that appeal to us: 15 ways to stop yelling at your kids, or 5 secrets to raising obedient children. 5 Ways to respond when your kid says I hate you. And on and on they go. Trust me. Just type out “parenting” in pinterest and you will have everything you could ever hope or dream of.
The problem with that, is that I don’t really have a yelling problem (I mean, I have plenty of other problems, that just doesn’t happen to be one of them), The Bible is super clear and specific about how to raise obedient children and my kids have never told me they hated me. So then. Every time I read any kind of article about parenting, I feel like they are assuming that I’m clueless, that my kids are going to be bad, because all kids are, and that I have to be realistic and not think that God has anything to do with some of these issues I face. Obviously I’m not implying that no one has any words of wisdom when it comes to parenting, hence the Mommy Monday posts that I’ve been doing for a year! All I’m saying is this. It’s dangerous to believe everything I hear. And the reason I don’t believe everything I hear is because of the fact that stereo types and statistics lie. Not always. There are truths to some of them, but ultimately, there is one truth. God’s Word is truth. It never lies. So when it tells me how to live, how to train my children, what to do and what not to do? I’m gonna believe it.
Just this week, one of my kids started showing some anger. To be honest, it would have been easier to just roll my eyes, tell him to knock it off and then continue shopping. (which is of course, always where issues arise! Am I right?! It’s always in the grocery store when you can do nothing about it! I talk here about practicing obedience!) Instead, after we got home, I got out my Bible, some legos and gave the boys a little lesson. It was light hearted and fun, but it was oh so for real. I talked about how sin is a weight. It weighs us right down, so we can’t run the race we’re supposed to run. I took two lego guys. One had nothing in his hand, and the other one decided to get annoyed on his way to the race (added something to weigh down his hand) Then he yelled at his brother (added something else to weigh down his hand) and on and on. Now it was race time. Which lego guy had the better advantage? Obviously the one who did not have anything weighing him down! I also talked about how in Hebrews it tells us that sin easily trips us up. So I put out obstacles in front of both “runners”. The one who was already weighed down with sin couldn’t even see the obstacles in front of him so he fell easily again and again. While the one without any weights could dodge the obstacles. God tells us to lay aside those sins. Throw them off. Run the race without the weights. It’s so much easier. This is the kind of training my kids need to hear. Truth.
Now most of you might have read somewhere along the way, that every kid that age is going through anger and different emotions and you need to just wait it out. No stinking way jose. I also don’t believe that any age is too old to use object lessons. The lessons I gave that day with the legos helped ME. I need to see how easy it is to hold on to sins that I don’t need to hold on to. I need to see how I am making my own race harder because I refuse to let go. I don’t read about this kind of thing when I check it out on pinterest. Because sometimes I think people look too hard. It’s all right here in God’s Word. All of it. Yes, we need to apply ourselves as parents and use the Word to teach and train our kids. But we don’t need a phd. We don’t need a visit to the psychiatrist. We need God’s Word. That gives us what we need.
So I hope that as you read an article here and read an article there that you always take into consideration where the writer is coming from. Is it written based on their experience? Is it written based on the statistics? Or is it written based on Truth? It is so important that we are following truth. Don’t believe everything you hear. Believe Truth.