Big-time. You know the word. Who do you think of when you think of someone being big-time?
Sometimes, Adam will joke with me and tell me that I’m big-time. He’s trying to make me feel important. He’s nice like that. But I think that we all have an idea of what big-time is, based on maybe status, money, talent, and a few other things thrown in there. It’s those things that seem to validate us. Seem to determine how much worth we have. Just how big-time we are…according to all the other people around us.
It’s a funny thing, really, because we live in a world where we are being evaluated, graded, judged by everyone around us. I mean…sometimes people may not even know that they are actually validating or invalidating a person, but they are. If someone likes your picture. If they follow your page. If they comment on a post. If they unfriend you. If they talk behind your back. If they encourage you. It’s a constant stream of being validated, invalidated, validated, invalidated. Over and over.
And we are constantly looking for validation. I have been really aware of this since I haven’t been on Facebook for the month. I realized that I don’t care as much about how many “likes” are on my photography page. I feel like I would normally link that last sentence to my Facebook page, in the hope that someone would “like” it. Why? Why would I even care to do that? It’s so silly really. So someone (who I most likely don’t know, and will never meet) can click a button on the computer? That makes me feel big-time? How crazy is that?
I realized that I care a whole lot more about the people in front of my face. The friends who are texting me. The people who come over for coffee. The clients I meet at starbucks who become my actual friends.
The real. live. people in front of me. That’s who I want to care about.
But it goes even deeper than that. If I have one friend, or a million friends, even they are not the ones who determine my worth. The only one who can determine that would have to be the one who created me. Yes? That makes sense? The fact that God is the one who created me, should lead to the next most obvious step. I should care more about what HE thinks of me than any other person, right? But somehow, things have shifted and I seem to be spending more time trying to impress, work hard for, live up to the people around me rather than the God who created me. That’s so backwards. And it totally and completely explains the fact that I still do not feel completely satisfied and fulfilled even when I have reached over a thousand likes. Or I have people liking a picture, saying good things about me or following my blog.
When I am looking for validation from the wrong place? I am going to end up with the wrong feelings.
The times I feel totally and completely satisfied and content are the times I am pleasing God.
Sure, it feels good for a while when I have encouragement and validation from other people. But it doesn’t last long, and I just as quickly feel the opposite when someone unlikes, unfollows, talks bad, or puts me down.
So the moral of the story. I think we all know it, really. Deep down we know it.
People don’t determine whether or not we’re big-time.
People don’t determine whether we’re good enough or not. They can’t! They are just people.
God determines our value. And to Him? We are incredibly valuable. It isn’t based on silly things like status, money or fame. It’s simply based on the fact that He created me. And to Him I am precious. And so are you, by the way.
So how do you live life when you’re not big-time? You realize that you are big-time. You are valuable and you are precious to the one who created you.
So the next time you start feeling down about how you look, or what people think about you… Just remember something You’re looking for validation in the wrong place. And you’re going to get the wrong feelings.
Sharing a few pictures of our recent visit with Adam’s parents! We hadn’t seen them in 2 years and the boys had grown quite a bit in that time!