missing the little things

i have loved every stage that my boys have been in.
well…ok. maybe not every stage…i admit that i am not a huge fan of the baby years.
but i do love ages 2+.
i loved when they just started talking. i loved when they were toddling. i loved when they were learning to read. i loved when they wanted me to hold them. i loved when they learned to swim, learned to ride a bike, learned how to cook.
i just love it. and i don’t want to forget it.
the boys took their tests this week for the end of the school year.
i was watching riley as he took his, and i thought..i love those little hands. the little scars on his fingers that remind me of the time when burned his hand on an iron. awful. just awful. but reminded me of the fact that he is fine now, and doesn’t even remember it.
i want to enjoy the little things.
i look up to aj now. i can’t even believe it.
they just grow up so fast. i hate the thought of it in some ways, even though i really do love all these different stages.
i love watching them grow into young men, but honestly? even as i am writing this, i am getting a lump in my throat because it reminds me that they are getting old!
and i am not being asked to hold them anymore! i am not teaching them new words and teaching them how to tie their shoes!
they are older and entering new phases of life.
i am just feeling particularly emotional today for some reason. and part of me wishes that i would just keep typing. typing what is in my heart because it would feel good to get it out.
but then the other part of me is reminded that everyone can read this, and not everyone can be trusted with my emotional feelings and my dreams.
so i will stop and just remind you to stop today and be thankful for the little things.
be thankful for the piles of legos in the middle of the floor, because before i know it? those legos will be replaced with something else. and before i know it, my boys will be men.
so while i miss the little things, like aj’s hands…which are now bigger than mine. i will enjoy riley’s sweet fingernail-biting, scarred, precious little fingers.
and i will be thankful for what i have today.

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